WHAT I’M LOOKING FOR (FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING….)
This post has been on the back burner in my drafts for months now — I have drafted it, re wrote it, then eventually gave up trying to make a post that offends no one I’ve ever been with — which… I’ve come to realize, is impossible. With that in mind, ENJOY.
1) You must, absolutely, be interested in scary/horror films. You must also, absolutely, not like romantic comedies. I’m sorry but I am not willing to waver on this — I love guts, people running up the stairs in masks with knifes and girls running outside in the rain in white shirts. I do not like any movie starring Kate Hudson and or Jennifer Aniston. I could guess the outcome of those films before walking in and save myself the $12 dollars. Thank you very much.
2) You have to have a sense of humor — why? Because I have a very dry one — and appreciate those around me who can make me laugh. While I don’t expect to start dating a comedian any time soon (again I say, I don’t mean to offend any of my fellow past hookups) but I think you need to be able to make me laugh. I’m also too Type A to be with someone as Type A as myself, it’d make for the most uptight couple alive.
3) You have to be dorky — in one context or another. I love to watch cartoons, eat pudding and waffles with whipped cream, read a lot and know all that’s going on in the news. Yes, I am in fact very nerdy. I also never missed a lecture in college — ok, I may have been THAT girl but whatever yo, don’t judge. Point of the matter is that, I need my “other half” to be well read if nothing more. Perhaps they don’t have to partake in my Sponge Bob/ Jimmy Neutron watching, but they do have to know what recalls have occurred in the past month or two, sorry I’m harsh — but it is what it is.
4) You can’t like cats….. or rodents….. or snakes. Yeah, there’s no need to even explain my rationale for this but I don’t like cats — I also don’t like “cat people” meaning those of you whom stay in rocking chairs petting your cat and feeding it milk? Please don’t contact me, ever. I also am WILDLY afraid of mice, rats, rodents, vermin — tomato, tomatoe. If you have a liking for animals with big gross tails? I’m going to pass on your dinner offer. Lastly, my next door neighbor growing up had a snake as a pet… he also had longer hair than myself…. and a black trench coat. Need I say more?
I’m sure this post will offend some, intrigue others and do nothing for the remaining readers but the post had to be done. I may also, if I so desire, update this as I experience more of NYC, as a young girl out on the town. As of now, the requirements are staying put.